Shut the F*** up

If you thought we were done doing a Comfort Zone challenge after one, you clearly don't know me very well.

Allowing time for Spring Break, and for me to take notes and scheme, we just set each other our next challenge.

I admit, I was nervous as to what Marlene would set for me.  We recently had a conversation about my personal Comfort Zone after a comment from a friend that she didn't believe much in life was outside my comfort zone.  I knew Marlene was taking  mental note of that so I fully expected it to be something really challenging to "up the ante" and really push me.

Marlene and I never stop talking when we are together.  The deep and meaningful discussions we always have about everything and anything are one of the many things I cherish in my friendship with her.  So when she mentioned what my next challenge was going to be, I knew it would have to be with her to push me even more.

She challenged me to go on a 24 hour silent retreat but gave me the option of going alone, going with my husband or with her.  Going alone would have been a breeze for me as I am not one to strike up a conversation with a stranger anyway if I don't need to and am comfortable in my own silence.  Going with my husband would have been a bit of a challenge, how would I nag him if I had to be silent, lol!  Going with Marlene is going to be hard.  I knew I would be bursting to discuss things we see and the experience we were going through with her but having to wait 24 hours to do so would be challenging.

Giving it some thought I decided that it would be easier than I thought, just take a few good books and read the whole time, not so hard.  But then I stupidly asked Marlene for some parameters.   What could we bring, what we could do and if any level of communication was allowed, note passing etc.

NO BOOKS she said!!!  I kicked back at first and whined a little, I must admit as I am always reading when I can and couldn't stand the thought of missing the chance of all those quiet hours of reading.  Then I remembered the name of the challenge, The Comfort Zone Challenge, and realized that to really push that zone I would have to follow her rules.

I can journal, color, knit, meditate, prepare my meals, hike etc so have options.

Marlene went to visit the retreat to get a feel for it and sent me some pictures.

My comments on the pictures were "Looks lovely although it also looks like the set of a bad horror movie in the woods"!

Watch this space for how it goes in a few weeks.

Think about grabbing a friend of your own and challenging each other as well.

Not just a Giant Floating Head

So what do you do once you complete a comfort zone challenge with a friend?

You ask for another one, of course!

I mean, what could go wrong, am I right?

Hold my celery juice, Medical Medium! Maybe I should have thought this 

through a bit more.

If you are sensing some good-natured hesitation on my part then you 

sense correctly.

It’s only natural for version 2.0 to be of a steeper nature and so here 

we are. Hazel has been keeping a list of comfort zone challenges that 

would push me outside the familiar ... and she chose well because this 

one has me squirming way more than last time.

A little back story:

A few months back we tried flotation therapy (aka sensory deprivation 

tank). I didn’t anticipate it but it was a challenging experience for 

me. I wound up doing sensory deprivation “light” ... meaning I left the 

“lid” open and some light on. Closing the lid created an instant 

claustrophobic/panicky experience and since at the time ... there was no 

challenge involved... I just did it in a way I was comfortable.

Flash forward a few months later... we are debriefing the experience 

with our husbands over lunch. I made reference to my extreme discomfort 

at feeling like a “floating head” (no sense of touch, sound, light, etc. 

... you get the picture) and also being shut up inside something not 

totally dissimilar to a coffin. I most willingly admitted over lunch 

that I was indeed “afraid of dying” and this flotation tank definitely 

triggered that fear. Little did I know at the time that Hazel was 

listening VERY closely for the edges of my comfort zone. 😉

So, ladies and gents ... that’s my challenge. To re-enter the tank with 

lights off and lid closed - 100% for 45 minutes.

I considered declining the challenge because that is indeed an option 

however I realized that having some sort of breakthrough around this 

experience was actually of interest to me. I mean lowering the threshold 

of fear - that can be useful especially around the fear of dying since, 

well ... we all gotta do it at some point!

Hazel made a brilliant suggestion ... that if I did decline I ought to 

write a blog post about it to provide some sort of accountability. It 

was in thinking through the blog post that I came to the conclusion that 

there was MORE available to me in pushing through whatever the 

discomfort was than in writing the post. So here we are!

Round two - sensory deprivation tank - game on.

I am starting off by using a technique of altering my “language” around 

this experience. “The possibility that I might enjoy being in the tank.” 

By "re-wiring" my neurons around a new “story” I am hoping to open up 

the potential for new questions, inquiries and observations... and a new 

way of perceiving the entire experience.

I’ll be back to let you know how it goes! Support and encouragements 

welcome!